Islam Under Scrutiny by Ex-Muslims

From Islam-lover to Islamophobe-lover, Part 2

  • >>> Part 1 here

    Yes my friend I assure you I do tell people about your site. In fact I talked to one of the Muhammad worshipers, (because basically that’s what Islam really boils down to) I talked to one of the Muhammad worshipers about your site and explained how accurate you seemed. I was hoping for some response such as: “Well Islam has done some wrong and I’m so sorry for that.” Instead he said, you guys were a bunch of Baptist preachers who got together and made all these sites to make Islam look bad! And he told me how educated he was and basically implied that because he is so educated and I am not, he is right and I am wrong.

    I was a slave for the shackles I put on my self. But I did it out of love. I knew first hand what it is like to be a victim of discrimination, a victim of hate a victim of evil. And in my heart I could not bare that others should be as I had been, so full of pain and sorrow. Desperate to belong in a world, where I did not know my place, I struggled to conform, struggled to fit in. But there was always something different about me. I always knew all forms of abuse. I knew this abuse even as a baby. But of all these forms of abuse that which caused me the utmost suffering was the lack of love. I was starved for love starved to matter in this world. And to starve for love is a pain greater than I could bear and it was something I would not wish on my worst enemy. As I grew older I saw that it was not only me and my siblings who suffered in this world, but the world was full of suffering people. People starved for love and a place to belong. And so I decided I would make it my goal to love the world right into a better place for us all. I was doing that play it forward thing before there was ever a movie about it.

    I grew up raised by many different people, from Atheist to strict religious. My step grandfather was atheist, my grandmother a catholic, and both were very abusive to me. Religion was a constant in my life. And as I passed from one family to another and to the next, abuse and hellfire and brimstone teachings were a constant. But I rebelled against the notion that a good loving god could be so psychotic and I raised my voice and said so. I said so not because I wanted to hurt the believers but because I wanted to love the disbeliever as well as the believers. For that I was demonized and called satan at times etc. Still I loved the believers, so I tried to please them, but I also loved the disbelievers. This left me torn in the middle somehow. Out of love I walked away from it all.

    When I learned how many religions there are I decided perhaps my fate, my destiny in my quest for a better world was to find the golden sparks within each faith and use them to help humanity love one another as equals not with all the differences and divisions, I was so happy at last I had found my path.

    Sept 11 happened to us all and my first response when I found out Osama was a Muslim and there was a religion called Islam, was love and mercy. I wanted to ensure that not all of Islam was persecuted for what Osama had done. So I defended Islam and Muslims. I still didn’t know squat about it though. Some Muslims told me that Islam was about peace and love and Muhammad was a great prophet of peace who love and liberated women. They made him sound Christ like, and they made Islam sound like some small persecuted religion of peace and non violence. And all I felt was an innocent love and acceptance, I sought to embrace Islam with love, to love and be loved and work together for a better world for all people. But from the start I was lied to. They depicted Muslims as the poor peaceful yet persecuted minority. The truth is that Islam is the persecutor of minorities. Still at first, though I had questions about the faith and the founder of the faith, all I wanted was to love and be loved. After all, I had had some very bad experiences in my own Christian background. I had been demonized so many times as a child I began to be truly afraid the devil was in me. After all I was accused so many times, because I would not bow, nor would I submit to anything as barbaric as eternal hell for humanity.

    Anyway, after I embraced Islam with love I discovered too late that Islam was even worse and its eternal hell even more barbaric. A submitted slave who dares to question the faith is as bad as a disbeliever. Once again I was demonized. Demonized because I dared to love, dared to stand for the disbelievers as equal to the believers. Now I stand again and walk away. Now yet again I am cast down and again demonized and satanized.

    But I have a message and that message is: I do not walk away from Islam because I hate the believers. Oh no! I walk away because, I love the disbelievers. And I am thoroughly ashamed of how we the believers have treated them. And yet still I love you as the believers but I love the disbelievers too. I did not bow for the belief that demonized the disbelievers and condemned them to eternal hellfire in my own original religion, why would I bow for such a barbaric belief in a new religion that is even crueler to the disbeliever? You can make me the great Satan in your minds, you can demonize me if you must, but I walk away, not because I hate but because I LOVE! I love the disbeliever as much as I love the believers and never will I submit to any eternal evil cast upon them. You may vilify me and satanize me if you have to, but someday, someday you will have to ask your selves why your devil loves more than your god. I am and have been a slave, but now I am setting my self free.

    P.S. I love you all! I think you are the great heroes of the world and the most beautiful people and I am ever so grateful that you stood. I love all of you thank you faithfreedom!


    Dear Dee Anna

    I believe you have found the essence of religion within yourself. Religion is a way to find God in our hearts and to love our fellow being. You have done both on your own. You reached your destination, flying. You took no roads. All roads were proven to be torturous and thorny for you. Yes, love is the essence of religion. This is the eternal principle of all good philosophies and faiths. Once you reach the point that you love all mankind and become blind to the differences that separate us, you have reached the pinnacle of humanness. This is a lofty station, at the reach of all of us and yet it is the path less trodden.

    Many people who defend Islam do it out of the goodness in their hearts. They have the best of intentions. Alas the road to hell is paved with good intentions. In Persian we say, kindness to the wolf is cruelty to the sheep. Unfortunately the world is reluctant to see Muslims as wolves. Muslims are wolves for what they believe and what they practice. It is their demonic cult that converts them into deceitful and hatemongering murderers. Otherwise we are all born innocent and pure. We become who we are through indoctrination. You were lied to, like all of us. Every Muslim is lied to and he then takes upon himself to perpetuate that lie, to keep lying to himself and to others. But we are free. No amount of indoctrination can overcome our free will. Once we come to age and can make choices on our own then the excuse that I was indoctrinated is not a valid excuse anymore. We become responsible for our actions, for what we believe and what we do. Muslims are not innocent. They are guilty for what they believe and for what they do. There is no excuse for hating our fellow being. Foolishness is not an excuse.
  • - FFI Editor

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